By Despondent Correspondent | Oct 24, 2012, 09.23 PM IST
NEW DELHI: Ravan, the former ruler of Lanka known for his daring abduction of Sita, exploded into flames on Wednesday night during Dussehra after President Pranab Mukherjee rejected a dramatic last-minute mercy plea by the 10-headed demon.
Mocktale has with it Ravan's last statement. He wrote: "I urge you, Mr President, not to treat me in the same league as Kasab. Unlike me, he is just evil. Besides, I am better looking."
"As you know, I was shot in the belly button by Lord Ram, which was just cheating, as Ram used navel power. To add to my misery, you make horrendous films in my name and burn me every year using crackers of dreadful quality. Where is the justice in that?" he asked.
Sources close to Lord Ram rejected the cheating claim. He just made a "belly good" target, they said. Ravan's lawyer, ironically named Ram Jethmalani, told reporters to leave Ravan alone. "If you want to target fat celebrities, go after Gadkari," he said.
Ravan asked the president if it was justified burning a public figure considering the prices of petrol and diesel. Besides, doesn't it lead to air pollution? he asked.
"First, your Hanuman comes to my country, spins a tall tail, and causes the worst case of air pollution ever and now this. And where is your PUC certificate?" he fumed.
Ravan also decried the practice of burning effigies. "Your people burn effigies of corrupt netas. I am sure it feels good. But it's a travesty of justice to do the same thing to them that you do to me, year after year. They make me look like a saint. Please for the love of God, stop this inhuman practice," he wailed.
" Yes, I abducted Sita. But I flew her in Kingfisher. I also kept her in Ashok Vatika - it's a 5-star hotel now. I treated her better than your khaps treat women here. Besides, your Ram's brother cut off my sister's nose damn it! Did you know how much she had to spend on plastic surgery? Thankfully, docs say she can follow the trend and become a Bollywood star."
Meanwhile, the National Commission for Women condemned Lord Ram's brother Laxman for cutting off the nose of a hapless woman. "Such a procedure should have been performed by a trained professional only," it said
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/home/mocktale/President-rejects-Ravans-mercy-plea/articleshow/16943368.cms?
NEW DELHI: Ravan, the former ruler of Lanka known for his daring abduction of Sita, exploded into flames on Wednesday night during Dussehra after President Pranab Mukherjee rejected a dramatic last-minute mercy plea by the 10-headed demon.
Mocktale has with it Ravan's last statement. He wrote: "I urge you, Mr President, not to treat me in the same league as Kasab. Unlike me, he is just evil. Besides, I am better looking."
"As you know, I was shot in the belly button by Lord Ram, which was just cheating, as Ram used navel power. To add to my misery, you make horrendous films in my name and burn me every year using crackers of dreadful quality. Where is the justice in that?" he asked.
Sources close to Lord Ram rejected the cheating claim. He just made a "belly good" target, they said. Ravan's lawyer, ironically named Ram Jethmalani, told reporters to leave Ravan alone. "If you want to target fat celebrities, go after Gadkari," he said.
Ravan asked the president if it was justified burning a public figure considering the prices of petrol and diesel. Besides, doesn't it lead to air pollution? he asked.
"First, your Hanuman comes to my country, spins a tall tail, and causes the worst case of air pollution ever and now this. And where is your PUC certificate?" he fumed.
Ravan also decried the practice of burning effigies. "Your people burn effigies of corrupt netas. I am sure it feels good. But it's a travesty of justice to do the same thing to them that you do to me, year after year. They make me look like a saint. Please for the love of God, stop this inhuman practice," he wailed.
" Yes, I abducted Sita. But I flew her in Kingfisher. I also kept her in Ashok Vatika - it's a 5-star hotel now. I treated her better than your khaps treat women here. Besides, your Ram's brother cut off my sister's nose damn it! Did you know how much she had to spend on plastic surgery? Thankfully, docs say she can follow the trend and become a Bollywood star."
Meanwhile, the National Commission for Women condemned Lord Ram's brother Laxman for cutting off the nose of a hapless woman. "Such a procedure should have been performed by a trained professional only," it said
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/home/mocktale/President-rejects-Ravans-mercy-plea/articleshow/16943368.cms?
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